Dropping My Son Off: Learning to Support Without Fixing
We drove six hours to drop my son off at grad school. The weekend was filled with the usual rituals—Target runs, Trader Joe’s bags, setting up his new life. But beneath it all, he carried disappointment from an interview he felt hadn’t gone well.
As a parent, I wanted to swoop in and fix it. But adult children don’t need rescuing; they need reminding. Reminding that one moment doesn’t define them. That they already carry the strength they need. My role now is to stand beside, not in front.
The Angel Wings in Los Angeles
In the middle of all this, I found myself standing before a pair of towering bronze angel wings in Los Angeles. I stepped into them for a photo, but what I really felt was Lil—her own unseen wings wrapped around me.
Those wings reminded me: she is still here. Protecting, guiding, carrying us through transitions she never got to see but is still part of.
Emotional Support Woven Through Family
Back home, support took other shapes. My daughter is preparing for a move across state lines, excited and anxious all at once. I am her sounding board as she steps toward independence.
Then came my mom’s doctor appointment. Relief washed over us when we learned her breast cancer can be managed with a daily pill. No chemo. No radiation. Still, the weight of the word “cancer” lingers—and I carry that too.
And there’s more: the upcoming family meeting about caring for my husband’s ninety-six-year-old mother, where dynamics are heavy with history. My husband, too, leans on me as he balances grief and responsibility.
Everywhere I turn, someone needs wings. And often, I am the one holding them out.
Remembering That I Am Carried Too
But the angel wings remind me: I am not only the one offering support. I am also being carried. By Lil. By love. By small mercies like my mom’s encouraging diagnosis. By moments of grace that arrive when I least expect them.
When I feel pulled in every direction, I pause for a few deep breaths—because even two minutes of stillness can feel like wings opening.
Reflection for You
Maybe you’ve had weeks like this too—when everyone seems to need a piece of your heart at once. If so, may you find your wings too: in symbols, in small mercies, in reminders that you don’t have to hold everything alone.
💜 Who do you lean on when life feels like too much? Share below—I’d love to hear.